Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

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Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Thu Jul 28, 2011 6:01 am

yes, I'm bitching about my relationship again. blah blah boo-hoo.

Short story:

I'm sleeping in the guest bedroom and I don't know if we're going to make up tomorrow or if I'm leaving and we move one step closer to breaking up.


Very long story:

I'm going to say all the things that I can remember, as much for me as for you.

By some luck, I got 3 days off in a row (wed/thurs/fri). Our sex life hasn't been great lately. In fact, it's been mostly non-existent. We've done more since we started living in the vacation house together, but still woefully little. tuesday morning, I was promised some kinky sex, complete with lingerie and whatnot. We had okay sex that morning, but later that night I was rebuffed, and told we'd do it Wednesday.

So, wednesday morning, naturally, she seems to have some sort of head cold in the morning. This was sure to put her out of the mood, so after I made us breakfast and did all the dishes, I started drinking. It was maybe noon, but I had nowhere to go. A little later, she seems to be feeling better, so we're working on lunch together (we made a soup) and she starts drinking too. After lunch, I've had a good deal, we're watching netflix and she decides to start crafting. She's working on this blouse/top thing for a while, and I'm starting to feel pretty good about the sex again.

at around 6 or 7pm, I go to initiate, and she's too absorbed in her work, but she okays me for later (I think). I go sit on the couch with my raging hard-on, and watch her measure her boobs and other things. 15 or 20 minutes later, I try again, still no dice. another amount of time passes and I try yet again, this time sticking my hand down her pants to squeeze her ass, and I am angrily told to stop and she goes back to work.

I've literally had my dick out for about an hour now while she's cutting and pinning, and frankly I'm tired of it. The mood is gone, and I'm feeling ignored, so I go upstairs to the balcony, hoping that she'll realize I'm gone and come look for me, then we can chat. After maybe 20 minutes on the balcony, I fall asleep on the bed that's out there and wake up not too long after. now my feelings are hurt.

I come in to find her digging through buttons, and she very non-nonchalantly asks me about my nap and whether I remember a button bowl we saw once. I'm no longer drunk, and I'm not feeling very cheery, so I pause the god-awful horror film she has running on her laptop and try to talk to her about feeling ignored. I may have said it like a dick, I'm not actually certain at this point, but it's a legitimate concern. she gives me some excuse about having said she wanted to get stuff done today and how she was focused, and that she felt like me sticking my hand down her pants was molesty. All I can think is that it only takes 30 minutes to an hour to have sex with me, and she can work on crafts any time while I'm working, or after we fuck if she wants.

rather than discuss this, she goes quiet. I don't know what to say, so I say I don't know what to say. she starts crying and runs to the bathroom. she tells me to go home because she needs a few days to be alone (conveniently the days I have off, of course). I'm like, fuck that, all my stuff is here and I want to talk about it, so I took my laptop and my phone into the guest room and I've been hold up in there since 8:30pm. perhaps, ill-advisedly, I've tried to start a dialogue via text messages, but she was having none of it. she told me to go home again.

I don't know what happens from here. It doesn't seem like a huge deal to me, just something we need to talk out, but she's gone mental and being told to leave for several days because of it actually upsets me a lot. Everything else in our relationship is great, but I'm afraid we might have to break up because our sex life has become miserable and she's unable or unwilling to change.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Ozzman on Thu Jul 28, 2011 3:08 pm

I don't know if it would help, but maybe you can ask to help her with what she's doing. Sometimes I find that doing a crappy thing that helps out the girl will lead to sex. You gotta give to get, sort of speak.

Or maybe she's starting her period?

I hate when girls use sex like you would a carrot on a stick in front of a horse to lead him around.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by NOT MONGO on Thu Jul 28, 2011 4:13 pm

bro, this girl has caused too much drama for you. youre a cool dude and dont need the after-school specials.

go your separate way, its obvious that she no longer likes you or shes a mental case (im going with the latter).

id rather have no sex than half-assed sex with a drama queen. no offense.

if she wants you to go, then go. fuck her and her bullshit. she should be careful what she wishes for if shes later bothered by you leaving.

take this advice into consideration but go with your gut
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Thu Jul 28, 2011 9:56 pm

Nothing has really happened today.

We talked a bit, but I more or less forced her to talk, and she's still angry.

She is starting her period soon. Probably a couple days from now. I wish she hadnt smoked all my weed.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Contra on Thu Jul 28, 2011 10:22 pm

this chick sounds like a weird bird.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Thu Jul 28, 2011 10:58 pm

that's the type I attract.

hang ups galore.

at least she doesn't have some other man's baby though.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Ozzman on Fri Jul 29, 2011 12:56 am

I attract fat girls. Or crazy girls. Or crazy fat girls.

I never fucking win. =(
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Soylent Brown on Fri Jul 29, 2011 1:30 am

Oh no.

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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Fri Jul 29, 2011 3:35 am

Fat girls like me, buy I don't like them back.

Things blew over, by the way.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Soylent Brown on Fri Jul 29, 2011 3:54 am

HOORAY!
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Fri Jul 29, 2011 12:24 pm

Hopefully she actually takes what I said to heart.

If she just sluts it up, it'll be perfect.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Mega2000 on Fri Jul 29, 2011 2:01 pm

women...
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Ozzman on Fri Jul 29, 2011 4:41 pm

now im nothing wrote:Fat girls like me, buy I don't like them back.

That made me LOL!
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by NOT MONGO on Fri Jul 29, 2011 8:55 pm

I feel like you jumped the gun on this one considering everything was fine like 24 hours later. Still think shes a littke strange though
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Soylent Brown on Fri Jul 29, 2011 11:24 pm

I don't think he jumped the gun it just sounds dysfunctional, honestly.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Sat Jul 30, 2011 2:34 am

It was the worst it's ever been.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Snoogans on Sun Jul 31, 2011 1:07 am

If you wanna try to work it out, do that. But if it continues to get worse, then you're only cheating yourself & you need to get out.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Soylent Brown on Sun Jul 31, 2011 2:58 am

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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Mon Aug 01, 2011 10:05 pm

This whole living together thing is supposed to answer my questions as to whether or not this relationship will work.

If I had to answer right now, she's a better friend to get high an hang out with than she is a girlfriend. Still 2 weeks left though.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Soylent Brown on Tue Aug 02, 2011 12:43 am

The first few months Chad and I lived together are not a good reflection of how living together on a long term period turned out to be. The first few months may not reflect accurately. It could be better, it could be worse. You guys are not like us and your situation is completely different, but I just wanted to point that out for whatever reason.

Anyway, the setup isn't really like living together as much as it is taking a long vacation.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Tue Aug 02, 2011 2:47 pm

I'd like to believe that, but I can't wait around hoping. I need some reassurance, which I'm not really getting.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Ozzman on Tue Aug 02, 2011 7:05 pm

The 3 girlfriends I ever lived with all went well when we started living together. It wasn't until between 6 months and a year when shit got sour. More arguments, more separation time was needed, etc. I guess everyone will have different styles. But that's how mine went.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Tue Aug 02, 2011 9:14 pm

It's been a little over 2 weeks, but the problems existed before.

I was hoping the shift from her parents house to a place where no one could bother us would allow us to get closer, but it hasn't.

Things are the same, if not worse. She gets high first thing in the morning, puts on some Netflix or hulu and plays games on her phone or laptop, or browses the Internet, or does some craft bullshit until she's falling asleep. She's almost stopped talking to me, but when she does it's because she wants me to do something for her. also note, I didn't say anything about her bathing herself.

If I mention anything is wrong, she becomes defensive, and gets mad at me for piling all the blame on her when she already feels bad.

Today, after her promising sex and being disappointed again yesterday, I asked why she didn't want to have sex with me, and she flipped out.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Robo-Pussy on Tue Aug 02, 2011 10:04 pm

Not showering is nasty. That is where I personally would draw the line but I'm big into hygiene. I have to say after reading your posts about her for a couple months now... she comes off as a total loser. I'm not saying that she is. I don't know her. But the person that has been described in most of these posts is lazy, selfish, and apathetic.

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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Soylent Brown on Wed Aug 03, 2011 1:12 am

now im nothing wrote:It's been a little over 2 weeks, but the problems existed before.

I was hoping the shift from her parents house to a place where no one could bother us would allow us to get closer, but it hasn't.

Things are the same, if not worse. She gets high first thing in the morning, puts on some Netflix or hulu and plays games on her phone or laptop, or browses the Internet, or does some craft bullshit until she's falling asleep. She's almost stopped talking to me, but when she does it's because she wants me to do something for her. also note, I didn't say anything about her bathing herself.

If I mention anything is wrong, she becomes defensive, and gets mad at me for piling all the blame on her when she already feels bad.

Today, after her promising sex and being disappointed again yesterday, I asked why she didn't want to have sex with me, and she flipped out.
This I totally understand and there's nothing right about it. Particularly the first part. That is why I compare it to a vacation and not necessarily living together.

Not bathing; is she doing that on purpose? So maybe you don't bring up sex anymore?

Being defensive is very very bad. If she feels bad about it, maybe she should consider actually righting it. The problem is likely with her, not distance from parents.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Ozzman on Wed Aug 03, 2011 4:33 am

To me, it sounds like she's already feeling closed in being around you. Not that you're doing anything wrong. But maybe she's just not ready for as much attention?

Can you go home? Or are you stuck because she's your ride? I would just leave. And let her know if she needs anything you're available. =/ I'm the single one though, so my idea might be stupid.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Robo-Pussy on Wed Aug 03, 2011 10:12 am

Ozzman wrote:To me, it sounds like she's already feeling closed in being around you. Not that you're doing anything wrong. But maybe she's just not ready for as much attention?

Can you go home? Or are you stuck because she's your ride? I would just leave. And let her know if she needs anything you're available. =/ I'm the single one though, so my idea might be stupid.

I would have left after the first argument! But that's probably why I'm single! hahaha

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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by NOT MONGO on Wed Aug 03, 2011 8:49 pm

in the words of missy elliott: shes a bitch

no homo
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by winterborne1 on Thu Aug 04, 2011 9:06 pm

Thats what happens when you lose weight and gain confidence in yourself. Everybody else starts looking like shit.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by NOT MONGO on Thu Aug 04, 2011 10:51 pm

oh snap
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Fri Aug 05, 2011 4:08 pm

I can go home, but I have a ton of stuff here to move back, and I like the house were staying at in any case.

I can wait until after the 14th. It's not like there's anything great for me at home.


Last edited by now im nothing on Fri Aug 05, 2011 4:10 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : The jews)
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Tue Aug 09, 2011 5:20 pm

I must seem incredibly wishy washy externalizing my inner monologue, but thi week has been going better.

Good sex, good times, very few misunderstandings.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by NOT MONGO on Tue Aug 09, 2011 5:45 pm

its not you. obviously her
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Wed Aug 10, 2011 2:42 pm

I agree.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Toothbrush on Fri Sep 30, 2011 9:31 pm

Dude, dump her already. But get and post nudes first.
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

Post by Garrett on Sat Oct 01, 2011 4:08 am

nah
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Re: Things went so poorly yesterday, I don't even know how to explain it.

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